“The Moon Disaster,” by Pink Ranger, opening crawl.

This is a tempestuous time for the V&V Empire. The good Emperor Vainqueur, wealthy may he grow, triumphed over the Legions of Thieves who would threaten his hoard. The path to the stars is open!

Among the scraps of destroyed arrows of metal, the courageous Buzz Jelly prepares to board a ship to the Mooooon! Its mission: to claim the new planet in the name of the empire and greed! Much gold awaits in the far reaches of space, but so do dangers!

Before a crowd of Moon Man cultists, Buzz Jelly received the blessings and buffs of their prophet (and the Emperor’s secret true love), Lord Victor, first among the minions. His Majesty Vainqueur himself wished the young slime luck, as it hopped to board the 'Sword Rocket.'

But none could foresee the tragedy, that would become forever known, as the ‘Moon Disaster.’

The Moooon...

Buzz Jelly looked up at the night sky, where the object of its dreams glittered true. A mighty sword of metal, the biggest Buzz had ever seen, pointed at the aster, ready to pierce the planet with its sharp pointiness. Enormous dwarves had opened its belly, into which Buzz would hop, with its adoptive spawner ready to give the stuntman a last hug.

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“Young!” Vainqueur Junior, or ‘Excalidad’ as its protégées nicknamed it, protested. While it had agreed to let Buzz pursue its dreams, now that the fateful day had arrived... “Young!”

“Sword rocket,” Buzz reassured its adoptive spawner, by reminding it of the absolute superiority of swords over all other shapes. Lord Victor also had every buff possible cast on the slime, to ensure the mission's success.

“Sword rocket,” Excalidad conceded, although still worried. “Far!”

“Return!” Buzz promised, before passionately reaffirming the pursuit of its passion. “Dream!”

Convinced by the faultless rhetoric, Excalidad nuzzled against Buzz and wished it luck.

“Let us do a final rundown,” Buzz’s trainer, the dwarf Marbré, briefed it alongside the engineers. “We only have enough powerstones for a one-way trip. To hasten the date of the launch and give hope back to the people after the insurgency, we have stripped the ship of any non-essential part. Seats, air, food…”

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“Anything other than a slime or ghost wouldn’t survive the journey,” an engineer said, which Buzz took as praise. “You alone can survive the acceleration, the vacuum of space, and the lack of coating.”

“I remind you that your craft is safe, for you have a chance to survive it,” Marbré added. “You, slime, are a true soldier of the Averagist Revolution. You can make it. You can export the revolution to the stars.”

“Stars!” Buzz agreed, although it privately didn’t agree with the cause. All that mattered to the slime, was to fulfill its dream and serve its country.

“Your role is twofold. First, you must survive all the way to the crash. Second, you must push the red button in your cabin, so our [Warp Projector] can open a gate between our two worlds. We will immediately move to reinforce the portal and ensure a permanent gateway between Murmurin, and the Moon.”

“Push!” Buzz repeated. “Button!”

“Remember your training,” the immense dwarf told the jelly, reminding him of the countless times ‘invisible vampiro-capitalist insurgents’ tried to sabotage the mission by blowing up prototypes. “Survive, and push the button!”

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The jelly hopped in response, before turning one last time to see the crowd of legged creatures who would witness the launch. It recognized the giant among giants, the great Vainqueur Knightsbane, and the Grand Vizier Victor, who had always believed in the slime. Its heroes!

“Believe!” Buzz, fueled by passion, delivered the most verbose speech known to slimekind. “Dream! True! Work! Fly! Moon moon! Sword! Heavens!”

The speech led to much controversy amongst the audience, however.

“Did the chosen jelly say heavens? Is it a political statement?”

“It’s an angel product placement!”

“Moooooooooooon!”

Buzz turned back and hopped inside the Sword Rocket. The metal door closed behind it, sealing the jelly inside a cabin full of steel gears, tin pipes, and other machine stuff; the big, rounded red button awaited its touch on a wall. Only a glass window allowed the stuntslime to see the outside world.

The dwarves, as eager as Buzz to pierce the heavens themselves, immediately initiated the launch. The slime shook in trepidation, awaiting the fateful moment.

And then…

KABOOOOOM!!!

Pushed by a mix of fire and gravity powerstones, the Sword Rocket flew straight to the skies at extreme speed. The sheer, overwhelming pressure flattened Buzz like a puddle on the ground.

Almost immediately, as the craft reached past the clouds, one of the pipes broke, shoddy bolts erupting in all directions. Steam entered the cabin, threatening to heat up the entire craft!

Having grown used to botched dwarfwork, Buzz instantly moved to action. The slime twisted its body into the shape of a pipe and replaced the metal one. The steam burnt it, making its sliminess boil!

You are taking medium [Fire] damage! [Regen] activated!

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